Fire-Bringer’s Madness
This is the day
Make sure you use it
For its master wants it back
That flame will cost me dearly
Make sure you use it
They scrape at my remains
That flame cost me dearly
I cannot bear it any longer
They scrape at my remains
And yet they… remain
I cannot bear it any longer
Though, this is my eternity
And yet they remained
His punishment was clear
Condemned, that was his eternity
He paid the price
His punishment was clear
He was doomed to torment
He paid the price
And so will I
He was doomed to torment
To forget everything he held dear
And so will I
This darkness is terror
Forgetting everything we held dear
Because the world needed light
Because the darkness was terror
Because they were afraid
The world needed light
My words and his fire
Because it was afraid
And so were we
My words and his fire
Their masters wanted them back
So, Prometheus and I; doomed to forget
Is this the day? I can no longer remember.
4 comments:
The repetition of pantoum form works really well with the idea of internal torment and struggle. It's a great take on the Prometheus myth and I like the minimalist style. "For its master wants it back" is my favourite line.
Yes, madness is a good vessel for a pantoum/a pantoum is a good vessel for madness. The circular form is reminiscent of the squirrel-wheel repetition the mind falls into. I like the way you've played with the form; wavering lines like "And yet they... remain" becoming almost stern, "And yet they remained." The repetition of "so" is very effective too. This is a fine example of the form, I think, Coleman.
This is from Vince:
Coleman's Fire-Bringer’s Madness is a poem where a poet sees a connection between the act of creative expression and Prometheus's gift of fire. I thought it was interesting that the mythological Prometheus delivers physical comfort in the form of fire while the physical poet delivers light and warmth to the soul. On the technical side the comma after though in the third stanza did not seem to serve the flow of the poem.
Agreed, re though-comma.
Post a Comment